Me, Myself, and Depression

This post is dedicated to those who fight this depression daily but don't have the courage to speak out about it.

Many people, for the most part, see me as a guy who is sarcastic and sociable at times. However, a lot of people never realized the pain and anguish that lived inside me. However, no one really knows what it is like to be me.

See, growing up in a Nigerian household, (I'm Nigerian, by the way) was very different from the typical American household. I couldn't do a whole lot as a kid. I mainly played with my siblings. I didn't have many friends. I remember kids calling me "African Booty Scratcher" and how it made me feel. I felt as if I didn't belong

It got worse in the seventh grade and begin to snowball once I entered college. My depression got so bad, I indulged in minor marijuana and alcohol use. I felt that if I did these things then the pain would go away.

I felt as if my life was not going to get any better and I began to have suicidal thoughts day after day. I actually contemplated committing suicide. I had a suicide plan and everything. I was going to drive my car to the very top of the parking garage at school and jump off of the roof.

I ended up talking to the school counselor and was hospitalized for a week in 2009. I believe that whole week was the avenue God used to heal me.

I still cope with depression long after my release from the hospital. In fact, I made a commitment to live my life in an optimistic manner despite my current troubles and struggles. I now read my Bible daily and I have come to terms with my depression and decided it will not define me.

I thank God for giving me the gift of the pen because writing basically saved my life.

Mental illness, especially depression, is prevalent in the Black community. We need to confront this issue before it causes the death of a loved one.

Daily Devotion: A Barometer for Spiritual Growth

Read | 1 Corinthians 13:11-13

Since our Father wants us to mature in the faith, we should stop periodically and examine our lives to see if we're making progress in this area. Physical growth is fairly easy to evaluate--all you need is a tape measure. But how can you tell if you're growing spiritually? Let's begin by considering how children develop.

Desires: Have you noticed that your childhood toys no longer interest you? The maturing process changes our desires in the spiritual realm too. When we're growing, the world's pleasures lose their appeal, while our hunger for God and His Word increases. We are eager to be with Him and share with others how He's working in our lives.

Understanding: When you were young, your perception of the world was very limited. In the same way, we lack spiritual understanding when we're new believers. But in time, we begin to see life from God’s perspective. Trials and temptations become opportunities for growth, and service for the Lord becomes an honor instead of a burden.

Selflessness: The most obvious sign of a toddler's immaturity is his selfishness. He wants his way, and he wants it now! Hopefully that is no longer characteristic of you. A mature believer is submissive to the Lord, willing to wait, and more concerned about others than himself.

How are you doing in these three areas of growth? Maybe it's time to let go of a few childish ways in order to grow into a mature believer. The greatest evidence of maturity is love. When the Lord and other people have first place in our hearts, it's then that we're most like Jesus.

Daily Devotion: Are you a threat to Satan?

Read | 1 John 4:4-6

Scripture records two occasions when Satan asked God for permission to test a believer. The Devil attempted to break the faith first of Job (1:6-12) and then of Peter (Luke 22:31-34). Jesus warned that Satan wanted to "sift" the disciple like wheat--shaking his faith in the way a farmer separates wheat kernels from debris.

 The Enemy hoped that Peter would fall away like chaff. But both attacks ultimately failed, and the men came through with faith restored and strengthened by the Lord. However, at the time of trial, each found himself attacked in the most vulnerable area of his heart.

Is your life making an impact worth talking about? Are you serving God in such a way as to make Satan feel threatened? If not, you don't need a major attack for your faith to suffer greatly. Instead of being alert and recognizing the battle at stake, you will be lulled into uselessness like a frog in water heating gradually to a boil.

But when you grow spiritually--rejecting lies and taking hold of the wholeness that is yours in Christ--you threaten the work of the Evil One. The Lord calls on you to extend His love to specific people because you have just the right knowledge, story, or temperament to reach them. And when you do, you reclaim stolen territory for His kingdom.

You may think you're not important, but the Lord knows your true value. As His beloved child and friend, you have an important part in His plan for eternity. Satan fears you when you recognize this truth. Fight back and rely on God's Spirit--greater is He who is within you!

Daily Devotion: God uses the Wicked

Read | Genesis 37-39

When we don't understand what God is doing or why, His ways can seem perplexing. The times when ungodly people seem to triumph over the righteous make us scratch our heads and wonder why the Lord doesn't intervene. But the truth is, He oftenuses the wicked to accomplish His purpose.

Joseph faced one hard-hearted individual after another during his years in exile. His brothers shipped him off to Egypt. His boss's wife accused him of an unspeakable crime. And even those he helped, like Pharaoh's cupbearer, forgot about him (Gen. 40:23). The actions (or seeming inactions) of God make little sense at this point.

But once the story of Joseph's life was written in full, it was clear that everyone who harmed or neglected the young man contributed to God's plan. The Lord used numerous people across several years to bring a humbled young Hebrew unexpectedly to power at the right moment to spare his family--who were the Messiah's ancestors--from the effects of famine.

In our circumstances, we can see God's actions only from the limited vantage point of our humanness. We experience the events He has allowed or caused but can't discern what He is thinking. Often the Lord's goals and purposes are hidden from us until His plans come to fruition.

God is sovereign over all the earth. We may wonder at the strange or even terrifying turns our lives take, but we can be certain that He is in control and at work. The wicked may triumph for a season, but the final, eternal victory belongs to Christ and His righteous followers.

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Daily Devotion: Devoted to God

Read | Psalm 62:1-2

Having been saved by faith in Christ, we express our love and gratitude through devotion to Him. Regular Bible study and prayer will be an integral part of our daily lives. In addition, our commitment to the Lord will be revealed through a passion to obey, a spirit of humility, and a servant's heart.

1. Obedience. David sought to obey God all his life. As a shepherd boy, he faithfully tended the animals in his father's fields. While king, he set aside his desire to build the temple and let Solomon lead the effort, as God had commanded. Although David lived imperfectly, his desire was to do what the Lord asked. We see from Jesus' words in John 14:15 that obedience should be our high priority as well: He said, "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments."
2. Humility. After David killed Goliath, the crowds shouted praise about the young man. However, he did not become prideful. Instead, he remained in King Saul's service and waited for God to make him the ruler of Israel. Even as king, he remained humble. He knew that what had been accomplished was because of the Lord's actions and not his own (2 Sam. 7:18).
3. Service. Whether David was a lowly shepherd or a mighty king, his goal was to obey God and serve Him.

This man after God's own heart was devoted to his Lord. He sought to know Him and longed to carry out His will. David's actions reflected His humble attitude of servanthood and his longing to please his heavenly Father. Take steps each day to be sure your life expresses commitment to Jesus.

The Basis for Discernment

Hebrews 4: 12-13

Since spiritual discernment is the ability to see life from God's perspective, it requires that we know how He thinks and acts. 

The Bible is His unchanging, infallible revelation of Himself. However, the Lord doesn't simply give us a list of facts about His character and ways. All throughout the pages of Scripture, He illustrates who He is and how He operates.

Although the Bible is ancient, it's not a dead book. It's alive and as fresh as if He were speaking directly to you. The stories may have taken place centuries ago, but the principles and applications are current and relevant. 

It's our instruction book about how to live. Guidance for decisions and discernment about situations are found from Genesis to Revelation.

God's Word is active and piercing. The words don't simply sit on the page. They penetrate our hearts and judge our thoughts and motives. 

This convicting quality is why some people don't like to read the Bible. But self-discernment is essential if we don't want to keep making the same mistakes over and over again. 

Some Christians live on a surface level, never understanding why they react to situations the way they do. But if we'll approach the Word of God with an open spirit, it will bring to light our hidden motives and reveal unrecognized sins.

Spiritual discernment involves seeing not just our circumstances but also ourselves from God's perspective. Have you learned to embrace the piercing sword of Scripture, or have you avoided doing so because it makes you uncomfortable? Remember, God's Word cuts only so that it can heal.

NCAA lays down punishment hammer toward Penn State

Penn State University learned its fate Monday morning as NCAA president Mark Emmert revealed the penalties it will imposed on the school in a live press conference.

Penn State received a four-year football postseason ban, a $60 million fine and loss of scholarships. Additional penalties include vacation of wins from 1998-2011 and five years probation. The bowl ban is the longest in college football history since Indiana in 1960.

Current Penn State football players will be able to transfer, become immediately eligible at the transfer school of choice and don't have to play as long as they are academically eligible.

The loss of wins will be noted on the late Joe Paterno's record and will immediately make the late Grambling coach Eddie Robinson the winningest coach in Division I history and former Florida State head coach Bobby Bowden the winningest coach in FBS history with 377 wins.

NCAA says that Penn State perpetuated a "football first" culture that must change. On Sunday, construction crews removed the statue of Joe Paterno from outside Beaver Stadium after days of protest.

Penn State has signed an agreement with the NCAA to accept these penalties.

Jerry Sandusky was convicted on 45 of 48 charges in the sex abuse case last month and faces a minimum sentence of 60 years in prison.